GIRLS ARE PRETTY

You’re not supposed to be here. The only reason she’s been here as long as she has is because you’re not supposed to be.  “I don’t even like...

Their names are Pam Lauren Henry Ragini Ben Freedie Jamie D. Laraine You hurt  them. You know you hurt them. They will never for...

You're pretty sure he's living with the wrong lady so you moved your stuff to their fire escape to wait it out. "I don't ...

You ask her if she wants a water, she says she's good. You ask her if she's been in the city long, she says too long. She asks you i...

She hates champagne. It's a fact. You know this fact. And if it's your job to give guests a peerless experience, catering to their...

He's got cancer but you've got needs. "Jeff," you type into Facebook chat. "I know I unfriended you a while back so...

You met this guy just now and you both agree you want to go to bed together so it's time to go shopping for beds. "How about this...

He never sleeps with his students, no matter how strong a bond he feels with them. "In the past," he says. "I didn't wa...

It was a tough blow when your parents came down to the basement to tell you they're getting a divorce. "We wanted to wait until y...

Your doctor has cared for you since you were a baby. He was your parents' primary physician, so once you and your siblings were born he ...

You've had your eye on the guy who lives in the building across the street. You see him in line when you get your morning coffee and you...

You show up every week to piss on the grave of the loan officer who foreclosed on your father's house when you were ten, resulting in yo...

You're hiding in the basement under the bakery for the next few hours until things calm down. The baker already saw you down there when ...

Monday There are a lot of big events this week, including discounted bullets at the rifle range, an 80’s themed yoga class, and at least t...

You and your coworker Louise always end up in the Schlotsky's break room at the same time and you never do anything but sit around readi...

He wandered into their backyard and started eating apples from their apple tree. "What do you want us to do with him?" they ask....

You meet this genie at a bar and you and him start talking and you hit it off so he gives you one for free. "One wish?" you ask....

"There's someone I'd like you to meet," your friend Karen says. "His name's Dan. He makes engines too." Yo...

You're only 25! Fighting for water and weapons has made these boys look so much older than 17! And since society has fallen and members ...

He comes in with a reservation for Economy. “You deserve better,” you tell him. “No one ever told me that before,” he says. You...

She put you in there and said you had to stay there until she could find a good place to park for the two of you. It's nice in the tru...

The last time you saw her she was twenty-six years old and screaming at you from across a rest-stop parking lot, waving down a truck to giv...

The following is an amended version of what I posted on girlsareprettyforever.tumblr.com, the tumblr where Girls Are Pretty lived for the pa...

The delivery guys are used to it. They know when a couple starts fucking, sometimes they get scared to put clothes back on and go back outsi...

The air conditioning turned off hours ago. It’s Friday evening and the only employees still in the office are currently sitting on this tw...

“Dana,” you say. “Come down. You woke Pam.” “Tell Pam to pop her tenth Ativan for the day and shut her hole. I need to think.” You lean ...

All your dead sisters wrote you a letter to tell you it’s your fault they’re dead. “You’re absolutely right to feel guilty that we died,” th...

The drunk teen who was behind the wheel fell in love with the paramedic bandaging his head but the paramedic fell in love with the lady cop ...

Last night they all checked in. They signed the waivers. They visited the ice machine and walked around the drained pool and stared out the ...

“Fuck!” you shout. “I wanted to date more. Put myself out there. I can’t do that if a whole Goddamned state is looking to me every goddamned...

Everyone in your family is fighting over who gets to keep your dad’s cremains. Your sisters are grabbing at the urn and then it spills and t...