Write yes for the question about whether or not you’ll sacrifice properly respectful attire for sexiness when attending middle school graduations or funerals.
Write yes for the question about whether you think about sex while you’re having sex. And write yes for what you’d say if a handsome stranger walked up and asked you if he could have your home address.
Write yes for the question about whether you’ve ever made love to more than two people at once, and write yes in response to whether you’ve ever made love to a door stop or a Pepsi can.
Write yes when you’re asked whether you’re afraid you have no sense of decorum and write yes when the quiz wants to know if you would rather be incinerated than wear underwear on Easter.
Write yes to the next five questions whatever the fuck they are, and write yes to the question about whether you’d consider having sex with an insect.
Wish you were having sex right now? Write yes.
Wish your body had extra genitals? Write yes.
Wish sex was a FDA food group? Write yes.
Prick your finger and scrawl the word yes in blood until the entire quiz is barely legible, wet and dripping red, the word yes spilled out from your veins and splattered across the paper.
Write yes when asked if you’ve ever had sex with someone you love. Write yes when asked if it was better. Write yes when asked if it was a lot better.
Write yes.
Check the results and you’ll find you’re a moderately steamy pot of sex juice but there’s still ways you can be sexier if you’d just quit being so proper and let that inner alley cat strut. Work on that.
Happy Take The Are You Sexy Quiz Day!
