The rock and roll star is sad because his brother is trapped in a mine.
“I’m gonna do a concert for him,” the sad rock and roll start will say. “Right next to the mine. And I’m gonna keep playing until he’s rescued. I’m gonna play for the rescue workers to keep their spirits up, and hopefully my brother will be able to hear me down there in that mine, and he’ll know I’m waiting here to give him a hug and buy him a beer.”
The concert starts off with a really exciting two and a half hour set, broken up by lots of stories about when the rock and roll star and his brother were growing up together and how much fun they used to have. “My brother used to always tease me about my music,” the rock and roll star will tell the crowd. “He prefers classic rock, not the kind of electroclash influenced emo that I like to play. But he always supported me. He told me not to give up. Well brother, I’M NOT GIVING UP!!!” Then he’ll launch into his next hit and the crowd will roar their approval.
After a short break, the next hour-long set is a little more subdued. Then the breaks start getting longer and the sets shorter. The Rock and Roll Star starts singing a lot more covers. By day two, after being awake and performing for 24 hours, he just starts singing things like “99 Bottles of Beer on The Wall” and “Happy Birthday.” Then he gets a second wind and does a really long set of nothing but Christmas carols. On Day three he brings a laptop on stage and sings the entire Duran Duran album “Rio,” reading the lyrics off the web. On day 4 he does a 45 minute version of the song “Ghostbusters” in which he doesn’t sing any of the verses, just occasionally shouts the refrain “Who ya gonna call” and makes the crowd shout “Ghostbusters!” which we all stop doing after a while. On day 5, the rock and roll star stops singing in any known language and he gives a performance that is hard to comprehend, but has flashes of absolute brilliance. On day 6, sleepless and crazed, the sad rock and roll star dies.
That’s when his brother is finally rescued from the mine. When he surfaces, he tells the cameras, "I was fine. I just heard my brother up here singing that crap of his so I hid from the rescuers until he finished." Everyone laughs and commiserates over how crappy his brother's music was.
"What do you mean was?" the rock star's brother says. When they tell him his brother died on stage, the rock star's brother screams "No!" at the sky. Then he punishes himself by diving back into the mine just as it collapses again.
Happy Sad Rock And Roll Star Day!
