Messenger Boys Day!
Your rock opera about a messenger service acting as a front for a male prostitution ring is not getting any interest from investors. For one thing, it might have been nice if the prostitution ring was serving a higher purpose. Like if it was trying to save a church or something. Your prostitution ring is trying to raise enough money to shut a church down. A small liberal church with a lesbian Pastor, no less. And honestly, the only real conflict in your script is that your male prostitutes love to thrill-kill, and so the pimp running the "messenger service" is constantly trying to dispose of corpses.
It's sweet that in the end the messenger service manages to shut down the church and all those churchgoers have to find another place to worship. It's always satisfying to see a story of hard work paying off, yes. But the closing number is too outrageous. No one would believe that all 16 male prostitutes would just then discover that they were all each other's long lost brothers. It's awesome, no doubt. Just a little unbelievable.
You asked for notes, you talentless cock puff.
Happy Messenger Boys Day!