Sunday, October 10, 2004

Phone Call Made On Tee Shirt Day!

You tell Michelle you know Karen's there. You tell Michelle if she doesn't put Karen on the phone, you're coming over there. You tell Michelle she should keep her little dyke nose out his relationship.

"I'll put my little dyke nose wherever I like," Michelle says.

"I know where you'd like to put it," you say.

Michelle breathes deep. The phone goes muffled. You think you can make out another voice in the background.

"Karen's not here," Michelle says. "But if you like, you can give me a message for her. And if I hear from her, I'll pass it along."

This fills you with such a fury you think you might jam your phone through the screen of your computer monitor. But you have to make the message count. Unfortunately, your supervisor is standing at your cubicle, his eyebrows raised in demand that you put your call on hold. You beg for one more moment with an index finger in the air. He doesn't leave.

"Tell her," you say to Michelle, casting an eye back to the impatient fellow leaning inside your cubicle wearing a tee shirt that reads, 'One Brand, One Vision.' "Tell her I'm sorry."

Michelle sighs. Even she knows how little that'll do. But you can't keep your girlfriend from leaving town with middle-management waiting to give you an FYI.

"I gotta go," you hang up and turn to Phil.

"Picture time," Phil says. "Get your shirt on."

"Shirt?"

Phil's face sags. This is what he was afraid of. You look at the letters on his shirt, unable to translate meaning of the symbols in your mind.

"It's brand rollout day," Phil says. He is so disappointed in you. "Every department's taking a group photo in their shirts. For the website."

"I forgot all about it Phil. Sorry man."

"You can't be in the group photo then," Phil says.

You affect some regret with your posture. At least you hope that you do.

Phil walks off allowing an exhausted sigh to trail behind him. You pick up the phone and dial Michelle's.

Happy Phone Call Made On Tee Shirt Day!