Just As You Finish Chewing Your Foot Off At The Ankle, The Elevator Starts To Work Again Day!

It’s almost like the thump of your limp disembodied appendage to the floor of the car hit a switch and sent the elevator back into action.

"That’s always the way," you say to yourself as you wrap your tourniquet tight around your calf.

Don’t worry. Your heroic tale will be an inspiration to people who have been trapped in a stopped elevator for upwards of 40 minutes everywhere. Not all of us would have had the gumption to take that first bite into the ankle. We’d think, "Maybe the fire department will turn up before chewing off my own foot becomes necessary." We'd ask ourselves, "Will chewing off my own foot help this situation in any way shape or form? After all, it’s not like my foot is stuck or anything."

Ultimately, it comes down to what kind of person you are. Are you the sort of person who will wait patiently for help to arrive, perhaps taking out a crossword puzzle to pass the time if one is handy? Or are you the type of person who will chew off his own foot at the ankle?

Today, you’ve answered that question loud and clear. Now hop along, Cassidy!

Happy Just As You Finish Chewing Your Foot Off At The Ankle, The Elevator Starts To Work Again Day!