It's Like The Frog And The Scorpion Day!

"The one where the frog asks the scorpion for a lift across the river?"

"Scorpion asks the frog," say.

"Which one am I?" she'll ask.

"Duh," say. "You're the scorpion."

"So," she says, "My suggesting moving in with you is comparable in your mind to you helping me across a river, and my murdering you before we get across, bringing about my own death by drowning."

"Right," say. "Wait, I thought they get across, then she bites him."

"She? Have you always thought that the scorpion was necessarily a female and the frog a male?"

"And they're dating, yeah. But I thought they get across, she kills him, and goes on with her life."

She shakes her head, which sort of turns into a shake of her entire body. "No, I think she bites him midway through, which illustrates the whole 'it's my nature' thing about it."

"That doesn't work as well," say.

"No?"

"No, not as a parable for dating."

She'll say, "Holy shit."

"What?" say. "I just don't think we're ready." Then go to your guitar lesson.

Happy It's Like The Frog And The Scropion Day!