It's The Alcoholics Day!

It's 1:30 AM and the alcoholics want to have sex with each other. But they don't know how to leave the bar.

"Right now I'm sober enough to maintain my erection," says the boy.

"And the state I'm in right now," says the girl, "I probably wouldn't fall asleep if you went down on me."

They order another round.

"You should really make that your last. I can see the fire in your eyes. You want to make love, but if you drink much more and stay here much longer, you're not gonna be able to," says the bartender.

The alcoholics nod their thanks and tip well. They drink their drinks while he strokes her thigh underneath her skirt.

"Is there anything left in that bottle up on your fridge?" she asks.

He stares sadly into the mirror behind the bar. Shakes his head. "Not enough," he says. She believes him. She doesn't want to go.

They order another round and start to fall into each other. Up on their stools, each with a glass in one hand, they do like they start to do at 2:20 AM. They smoosh up at the bicep and breathe in each other's hair. They kiss when their lips bump into each other, kiss in excuse me. They lean at the cheek, his hand goes all the way up her thigh, the heel of his hand grazing in the warmth of her crotch. They sip from their drinks and breathe quicker with the same speed that their eyes start to gray. They calculate how much money they have left in proportion to how much time before last call.

It's 3:10 AM and the alcoholics don't want to have sex with each other, but they're almost ready to go home.

Happy It's The Alcoholics Day!