Caress Her Like She's Dead Day!

Trust me, she'll love this. Set yourself heavy on the edge of the bed like your heart weighs a thousand pounds. She'll look up from her book to smile at you but you'll be looking at the floor. She'll read a little more till she remembers you're still there on the edge of the bed and she'll go stiff with the notion that you're about to tell her the decision you've made after having "given it a lot of thought." Just keep looking at the floor like you're terrified to look at her like this. She'll realize that you're about to caress her like she's dead and, instantly aroused, her legs will go sliding around grinding into the bed like she's making a sloppy snow angel.

When you look at her, deflate like it's so much worse than you thought. Part your lips with a silent gasp and she'll part hers with a damp pant and a coo. Search her face for some fossil of the life that used to thrive there. Let your eyes burrow into her skin, now slightly frantic because you can't remember what she used to really look like.

Hone in on the skin of her cheek, trying to find some hint of the blush that would simmer just beneath it when you'd walk into a room. Lift your hand but think better of it. Hold your hand there before her, the backs of your fingers there in the air a few inches away from her face. Hold it there until she's about to scream, then move in, a half an inch at a time. No grace to it, like something's tugging at you.

When the holy ghost can barely squeeze between your fingers and her face, shake your head as if you wish you could just walk away without feeling the kind of cold you know you're about to feel. Or like you wish you had something to pray to. But you don't, so stop breathing, touch her cheek with your index and middle finger, and immediately recoil like you almost walked into a room with no floor. Catch your breath quick because she's so hot right now she's gonna be up top inside of you like you were a magic jelly that you smear all over your skin before bedtime so as to wake up rich.

Happy Caress Her Like She's Dead Day!