Masturbating While Lying Naked On A Full-Length Mirror Used To Get You Off In No Time But Lately It's Just Gotten Really Belabored Day!

Perhaps it's your diet. Or maybe your efforts to insulate yourself from intimate emotional contact with others have somehow cut you off from yourself. And wasn't it you who spent that week in bed under the impression that you are undeserving of joy? I guess what we're trying to say is, don't come whining to us when you couldn't even get over yourself long enough to come to our birthday barbecue last Sunday. Maybe you oughta take a good hard look in the mir-- Um, we mean, it's all your fault. Because today's Masturbating While Lying Naked On A Full-Length Mirror Used To Get You Off In No Time But Lately It's Just Gotten Really Belabored Day!